I love Oscar...

No, Tarzan is safe, he loves Oscar too...

Tarzan walked outside and turned back to tell me "Oscar's back."

I stepped outside and sure enough, there was Oscar just sitting by the house, like he does every spring and fall.

We always muse, "Why does Oscar come up here every spring and fall?"

I turned to go into the house and noticed something on the bottom of the door. I looked closely and saw a scorpion with a BODY THE SIZE OF A QUARTER.

(Insert ooos and yucks here)

I calmly said, "Tarzan, look at the bottom of the door."

Tarzan moved quickly, and manly when he saw it. He took a broom and swept the scorpion outside and then beat the living daylights out of it.

We then both -- at the same time -- (I love it when that happens) looked at Oscar and then back at the scorpion and said "oooooooooooh." (You have to say that starting low and then making your voice go up and then back down)

Tarzan took the broom and swept the now deceased scorpion over to Oscar and we went into the house.

5 minutes later dead scorpion gone...we love Oscar.